Seeing

 

"Seeing is of course very much a matter of verbalization.  Unless I call my attention to what passes before my eyes, I simply won't see it."

Ann Voskamp,  "One Thousand Gifts"

I think this is one of the reasons I love pictures so much...it forces me to pause,  call attention to something, and truly see it.   And this blog, well, it is my verbalization.  The mom of six who said this, Ann Voskamp, is someone whom I have grown to admire and be inspired by;  I believe she has it exactly right.

And so with spring in the air, I am seeing more fully.  God makes this so easy to do.   I invite you to see what my eyes have been graced with lately, and to look and draw attention to those things in your own life that are wanting to be seen... and spoken.

We were both so excited to finally be able to turn her car seat around!

It is so much easier now to SEE.

Frolicking in the backyard with Baby.

Singing...

and taking her for a swing.

I guess this is how only children compensate...

I love this picture: the joy and anticipation in her face...

from a simple "special fizzy drink."

I guess I can understand why, since the last time she was around sand...

 at the beach, in  September, in a bathing suit...

that she would now want to take all her clothes off!

 

 

Getting the garden ready!

More ice cream!

Picking flowers (read: weeds)...

for my lovely bouquet!

Parachute!

 

Baking cookies with Abby...

and marching in the park...

during a slight spring rain.  (perfect)

 What have you been seeing lately?

Fun with Family

We recently took a trip to Indy to enjoy some of our favorite people and places.   Good times were had and lasting memories were made. 

At the park down the street from my Dad's house:

Cousin Lindsay...

and cousin Josh.

Lindsay and Papa.

I love my cousins!

 The Indianapolis Children's Museum:

So much to experience...

and explore...

and feel!

"What is this?"

Lindsay and I always have so much fun!

I loved the carousel!

Can you tell?

Excavating for fossils.

Aunt Lisa and Lindsay

Papa and Aunt Lisa

The dinosaurs were a bit intimidating!

beep!  beep!  coming through!

Lunch with our friend, Fr. Bob:

And, of course, a visit to Aunt Lisa's 2nd grade classroom:

Thanks to everyone for a great time... and, as always, for loving Lucy so well.

Eucharisteo

"The practice of giving thanks...eucharisteo...this is the way we practice the presence of God.  Stay present to His presence, and it is always a practice of the eyes.  We don't have to change what we see.  Only the way we see it."

  Ann Voskamp, "One Thousand Gifts"

Lately, it has been easy to find the thanks in our lives.

Like our traditional February visit from Aunt Bibbett...

And bubbles on the deck in February... 

The laughter shared between father and daughter...

And our own personal story time on the stage at Barnes and Noble:

 

Where have you found gratitude lately?

one year

"Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds,

for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness."

James 1: 2-3

Words elude me.  Today marks the last of the firsts, and something I have wondered about…how it would feel.  The answer is not surprising:   sad, as her physical presence is getting further away.  I still want to hold onto it;  I worry that I will forget it.  There is the realization that today isn’t really the last of anything, but only the first of the seconds…and that things will always be delineated in this way now: the then and the now, the before and the after.  One year having passed really doesn’t change anything, or seem to provide any end.  Not that I thought it would. She is still missed terribly, and no matter how much time passes, I can’t see how this will ever change.

One of the many blessings this blog has given me is a continued connection and correspondence with my Mom’s friends.   Recently, this is what one of them sent to me (thank you, Sue), knowing the anniversary of her death was approaching.  She thought it would help, and on this day when there are really no words, it does.

You can shed tears that she is gone,
Or you can smile because she lived.

You can close your eyes and pray that she will come back.
Or you can open your eyes and see all that she has left.

Your heart can be empty because you can't see her,
Or you can be full of the love that she shared.

You can turn your back on tomorrow and live for yesterday,
Or you can be happy for tomorrow because of yesterday.

You can remember her and only that she is gone,
Or you can cherish her memory and let it live on.

You can cry and close your mind, be empty and turn your back,
Or you can do what she would want…

Smile, open your eyes, love, and go on.

And so we do.

With her lasting memory deep within our hearts, every minute of every day.  

Thankfully, in this, there is peace.

This is a portrait of my Mom that was sewn (yes…sewn) by my good friend, Dave (thank you). It sits on a shelf in my kitchen.  Every night at dusk the flame-less candle (that my Mom gave me) comes on, illuminating her spirit… and replenishing mine.